What We Can Learn from Adam and Eve about Agency and the Law of Obedience

I’ve shared thoughts on the story of Adam and Eve before in a previous blog post. I thought of Adam and Eve’s story again this weekend after listening to the Semiannual General Conference of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

During this General Conference, both President Nelson and President Oaks focused their remarks on God’s Plan of Salvation and the way the choices we make here on earth will influence where we will live, who we will live with, and what level of glory we will attain in the next life. To live with our Heavenly Father and our families again in the celestial kingdom and receive a fullness of all the blessings God has to give us, we must be willing to live according to celestial law. President Nelson also emphasized the importance of living the law of chastity, which states that sexual relations are only appropriate between a man and a woman who have been legally and lawfully married.

I believe it is the responsibility of God’s prophet and apostles to clearly teach true eternal principles to God’s children. The fact that both President Nelson (the prophet) and President Oaks (his counselor and an apostle) felt the need to speak on these topics tells me that these are important truths that we need to take into consideration as we make choices in our lives.

As I listened, I also thought about the struggle of being an LGBTQ+ member of Christ’s church listening to these eternal principles being taught–especially an LGBTQ+ member of the church who feels they have been led by God through personal revelation to pursue a same-sex relationship.

Some may say that if someone thinks they have received personal revelation to do something that goes against the teachings of the prophet and apostles then they are wrong and it wasn’t really personal revelation. I think that’s too simplistic of a view though. It’s definitely something to be cautious of–it’s true that we can be led astray by Satan’s deceptions or our own desire for something and convince ourselves that that constitutes personal revelation from God. However, I’ve heard too many stories of people sincerely striving to follow Jesus Christ (and willing to make sacrifices to do so) receiving surprising personal revelation to believe that in every case our personal revelation is going to line up exactly with the general ideals taught by prophets and apostles. Sometimes life is messy, and the personal revelation we receive at different points in our lives can reflect that same messiness as God teaches us in uniquely personal ways the things we need to know to return to Him. I don’t think how we learn the lessons we need to learn is as important to God as that we learn them.

The story of Adam and Eve was fresh in my mind while watching General Conference, as I had just participated in an endowment session at the temple on Friday, and the retelling of the story of Adam and Eve is a significant part of the endowment session. I think a big reason for this is that we are supposed to learn something about agency and God’s commandments from their story.

The first law you covenant to keep in the temple is the law of obedience. This is the law that God initially gave Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden when He commanded them not to eat of the fruit of the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil. He also commanded them to multiply and replenish the earth, something they were incapable of doing as long as they stayed in their innocent state in the Garden of Eden (2 Nephi 2:22-24, Book of Mormon).

I mentioned in my previous blog post about Adam and Eve how unfair and unkind it felt to me for God to give Adam and Eve two conflicting commandments, basically setting them up for failure no matter what they chose. I think maybe that’s the point though. I think God is trying to teach us about mortal life and agency. We are never going to be able to earn salvation for ourselves through perfect obedience to the law. Paul spent a lot of time in his epistle to the Galatians talking about this. What we need is the law of sacrifice and the law of the gospel–the next two laws we covenant to keep in the temple. The laws that God gave to Adam and Eve after they failed to perfectly keep the law of obedience. The laws that hinge on God providing a Savior for us, Jesus Christ.

The truth is that becoming like God requires us to learn to use our agency well. It requires us to have choices to make between different things, sometimes between different good things. The truth is that every choice we make usually involves some sort of trade off. Our time and resources here in mortality are limited. We can never do all the good things there are in the world to do. We have to choose what our highest priorities are–what we want the most. We also have to choose which things we’re willing to sacrifice in order to get what we want the most.

Adam and Eve had the choice to remain in the Garden of Eden where life was easier and simpler, but where they were limited in their ability to grow and progress. Or they had the choice to eat the fruit of the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil, leave the Garden of Eden, become mortal, have children, and learn through their own experience the difference between good and evil, pleasure and pain, joy and suffering. In the end, Eve first, and then Adam, chose the more strenuous, painful path of mortality for the opportunity to have posterity, experience real growth, and increase their capacity to experience true joy. They could not have the benefits of a mortal experience without being willing to deal with the limitations and hardships of a mortal experience. Neither could they have the benefits of living in the Garden of Eden without being willing to accept the limitations of that existence.

And so it is with us, as we navigate our mortal life. There are many decisions before us, and God offers us a lot of counsel through the scriptures, current prophets and apostles, and the Holy Ghost to guide us in making the choices that will lead us to the growth and joy we seek. And sometimes some of those wise words of counsel appear to be in conflict. And we have to decide for ourselves: what do I want the most? What am I willing to sacrifice to attain my highest priorities? God cares what our answers to those questions are. He gave us the freedom to choose so that we could pursue the path that is in line with our highest goals for ourselves and our lives, here and in eternity. He seeks to guide us through His wisdom, but He also honors our agency and desires. And many of us must wrestle before God as Jacob did to understand what path and which choices at what time will lead us where we truly want to go.

Stay Close to the Lord

I was at a high school graduation party for my nephew tonight where we were asked to write down our advice for the new graduate. For some reason there was a general consensus amongst several family members that the advice I had to share would be especially wise and worthwhile. When I said the advice I had given my nephew could be applied to anyone in any situation, I was encouraged to share that advice with a broader audience. So, I thought, what the heck, I’ll write a blog post about it. After all, who doesn’t like a generous helping of unsolicited advice from time to time 😜

In a nutshell, my advice to my nephew was this: stay close to the Lord. I don’t know of any better advice one could give or receive than that. Other lessons I have learned in my life may or may not be applicable to other people, but drawing close to the Source of All Truth who loves you perfectly and does know exactly what you personally need to learn and do to progress and find joy and peace—that is something that would be of great benefit to everyone in every situation.

I have learned from my own personal experience that God lives, that He knows and loves each of His children intimately, and that He can be trusted and relied on. When I have chosen to turn to Him and seek comfort and guidance from His hand, I have been blessed immeasurably. Everything that I most value in my life has come from Him, and I am eternally grateful for those blessings, particularly blessings of knowledge that allow me to see my life more clearly and truthfully, which has led to a huge increase in the joy and peace I experience in my life and in my capacity to bless the lives of others.

Jesus says, “I am the way, the truth, and the life” (John 14:6). If you are wondering where to go in your life, seek Jesus. He will show you the way to go, teach you the truths you need to know, and help you create the best and most worthwhile life possible. Trust Him, seek Him, stay close to Him—there is no better way to find joy and peace in your life and to reach your divine potential than that. I bear witness of these truths, in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

Lessons on Prayer

This is another assignment from one of my Writers' Village University classes that I thought I would share here. I've been wanting to share stories from my mission and the lessons I learned from them for a long time. For this assignment I wrote about several stories from my mission related to prayer.

Lessons on Prayer

“Our Father which art in heaven, Hallowed be thy name” (Matthew 6:9)

My missionary colleague and I first met Jean-Luc on a street corner near La Promenade du Peyrou, a city park in the center of the city of Montpellier, France. Jean-Luc was sitting astride his bike, waiting to cross a small street towards the park when my colleague and I introduced ourselves and asked him if he believed in God. A lanky Frenchman in his 30s or 40s, Jean-Luc told us he worshipped God through dance. He gave us his number and agreed to meet with us at the park later that week.

At the end of our first meeting with Jean-Luc, we invited him to pray with us. Jean-Luc had never tried talking to God before. We taught him how to pray: to begin by addressing his Father in Heaven, to thank God for his blessings, to ask God for anything he had need of, and to close his prayer in the name of Jesus Christ, amen. Jean-Luc agreed to try, bowed his head, and proceeded to give one of the most humble, sincere prayers I have ever heard. When he finished, he looked up with this huge smile on his face and said, “Ca fait du bien!”

“Thy kingdom come” (Matthew 6:10)

The president of my mission was a man of great faith. A plastic surgeon from Virginia, he left his medical practice for three years to accept an invitation from the leadership of his church to serve as a mission president, overseeing about 150 missionaries assigned to teach the gospel of Jesus Christ to those living in the south of France.

At one particular gathering of the missionaries in my area, my mission president shared a story from his life with us. My mission president was a husband and a father to eight children. He told of a time when his family was reading the scriptures together. They came across a verse in the Book of Mormon where Jesus, teaching the people in the Americas following His resurrection, says,

“For verily, verily I say unto you, he that hath the spirit of contention is not of me, but is of the devil, who is the father of contention, and he stirreth up the hearts of men to contend with anger, one with another. Behold, this is not my doctrine, to stir up the hearts of men with anger, one against another; but this is my doctrine, that such things should be done away” (3 Nephi 11:29-30).

My mission president said that after reading these verses, he and his family made a goal to not have any more contention in their family. They prayed and asked God to help them. My mission president told us that it took his family three years to achieve their goal.

It had never occurred to me that having no contention in your family was a possibility.

“Thy will be done in earth, as it is in heaven” (Matthew 6:10)

The south of France has a significant population of immigrants from Africa, both North Africa and the francophone countries of sub-Saharan Africa. Belief in God tended to hold a much more central place in the lives of these immigrants than in the lives of the native French people we spoke with. I learned a great deal from the incredible faith of many of these people I had the opportunity to meet.

I remember one young woman from Africa in particular that I met on the streets of Toulouse. She was thrilled to meet my missionary colleague and me and talk with us about her relationship with God and how He had helped her in her life. One story she told us sticks in my mind. Full of faith that the Lord knew better than she did what was best for her life, this young woman prayed to God about a young man she was dating. She told God, “If this guy is not the right one for me, please take him out of my life.” The next day her boyfriend called her to tell her that he was moving back to Africa permanently. She took that as a clear sign from God and wished her boyfriend a happy life in Africa.

“Give us this day our daily bread” (Matthew 6:11)

Another woman from Africa I had the privilege to know lived in the city of Nimes with her daughter. She had fairly recently been baptized a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, and and she enjoyed having the missionaries stop by to visit. She had been asked to teach one of the classes at church, and she often asked for some help preparing her lesson.

I loved this woman’s relationship with God. She was always very frank with Him about her life and what she needed. She worked cleaning people’s houses, and sometimes her back gave her a lot of pain. She told us about one day when she was cleaning someone’s house and her back started hurting so much she couldn’t keep cleaning. She told us that she prayed and said, “God, you took my husband away from me, so now I have to make a living for myself. If you’re not going to give me a husband, you better fix my back so I can work and make money to feed my family.” She said after her prayer the pain in her back eased, and she was able to continue cleaning.

***

In the church congregation I attended in Montpellier there were twin sisters who both had a tremendous amount of faith and a gift for teaching. One of them taught a Sunday School class for those who were meeting with the missionaries or who had recently been baptized into the church. She spent a great deal of time and effort preparing her lesson each week, and it showed.

As part of her lesson preparation each week, this sister would make a set of handmade cards, each one with a different quote from scripture or from a current church leader on it. She would pray and ask God to help her find quotes that would bless the members of her class and that the right person would get the right quote. At the beginning of her lesson she would hand out a card to each class member. On more than one occasion I found that either her lesson or the quote card I received, or both, were exactly what I needed to hear that day.

This sister once shared with my colleague and me that she had made a promise to the Lord that she would spend her money and time making these cards and preparing these lessons every week for her class. In return, she asked God to look after her family and posterity and make sure they were never in a situation where they were without food or had to live in the street. For her service to the Lord she sought blessings of food and shelter for those she loved.

“And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors” (Matthew 6:12)

When I was living in Marseille, we met a man on the street near our apartment named Fabrice. A Frenchman in his late twenties, Fabrice had recently had a spiritual experience that made him eager to talk with others who believed in God. He told us that his father was a police officer and that his father had nearly died after being attacked by some fellow police officers.

When his father was in the hospital in critical condition, Fabrice had prayed and promised God that he would give up smoking and that he would not seek revenge on those who had attacked his father if God would let his father live. His father lived. Fabrice kept his word. In exchange for his father’s life he chose forgiveness, and when we met him he was eager to learn more about God and Jesus Christ and to make them a bigger part of his life, ultimately choosing to make a covenant to follow Christ and have his sins washed away through baptism.

“And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil” (Matthew 6:13)

One of the most interesting people I met on my mission was a member of the church congregation I attended in Nimes. This woman attended church every week, but she had trouble keeping certain commandments. She hadn’t been able to quit her habit of smoking, and for several years she lived with her boyfriend, the father of her two youngest children, out of wedlock.

Despite her struggles to abandon some of her sins, this sister did an amazing amount of missionary work herself. Through her influence her father had been baptized a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, my colleague and I helped prepare her adult daughter for baptism while I was in the city, and later her youngest two children also chose to have the missionaries teach them so they could be baptized, despite their Muslim father’s initial opposition.

I was amazed at all the good this woman was able to accomplish, despite her obvious imperfections. She had so many stories of different ways God had guided her in her life. She was such an example to me of how much God loves each of His children and how willing He is to help all of us, no matter how imperfect we are.

One story she told us was about the time back when she was still with the father of her youngest two children. She talked about how the first time she and her boyfriend broke up she prayed and prayed so much that she would be able to get back together with him. God answered her prayer, and they got back together. She said they made each other miserable though, so they broke up again. Again, she prayed fervently to be able to get back together with him. Again, God answered her prayer. And again the relationship made her miserable. Finally, she realized that being with her boyfriend was not a good thing for her, and she broke off the relationship permanently.

I found this story so interesting, because you would think that if you were living with a person out of wedlock, which is against a commandment of God, that God would not answer a prayer that would help you continue to break that commandment. And yet, God knew this daughter of His well enough to know that the best way to teach her the importance of keeping this commandment was to grant her desire to break it so she could learn for herself the negative consequences of her choice through experience. It was a testimony to me that God doesn’t care how we learn the lessons we need to grow and progress, He just cares that we learn them. Sometimes He delivers us from evil by first letting us choose evil so that we can learn for ourselves that that path does not lead to happiness.

“For thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory for ever. Amen” (Matthew 6:13)

The life of a full-time proselytizing missionary is a challenging one. Especially when you are in a country where people tend to have negative views of religion. A history of religious wars between Catholics and Protestants has turned a lot of French people off to religion altogether. They are terrified of cults and regard anyone trying to teach people about religion with suspicion. When everyone around you thinks you are doing something evil, you start wondering if you are.

I prayed often for help to have the courage to open my mouth and invite people to learn more of the truths that had been such a huge blessing in my own life. To invite them to learn more of the Savior and how He could help them. To invite them to learn more about where they came from, why they’re here on earth, and where they’re going.

We had a goal in my mission to have at least ten significant conversations with people we met on the street per day, conversations where we had a chance to teach someone something, testify of some truth we knew, and/or invite someone to do something to come closer to Christ. I don’t think my mission president could have picked a more difficult goal for an introvert like me to meet. Talking to strangers all day long to try to find people who were interested in hearing about God did not play to my strengths at all.

On one particularly difficult day, I introduced myself to a middle-aged French woman sitting beside me on the bus. Upon learning I was a missionary, she proceeded to chew me out, telling me that I was part of a cult and that I should be ashamed of myself for trying to trick people into joining it. After saying her piece, she stared stonily out the window for the rest of the bus ride. I shrunk inside myself, feeling like I really was a sneaky person trying to trick people into doing evil things. As I sat there, the words of a scripture suddenly came to my mind:

“Blessed are they which are persecuted for righteousness’ sake: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are ye, when men shall revile you, and persecute you, and shall say all manner of evil against you falsely, for my sake. Rejoice, and be exceeding glad: for great is your reward in heaven: for so persecuted they the prophets which were before you” (Matthew 5:10-12).

These words of the Savior instantly brought peace and comfort to my soul. I realized that just because someone thought I was doing something bad didn’t mean I was doing something bad. I was not trying to trick anyone. Choosing to follow Jesus Christ and keep God’s commandments had brought me a lot of blessings and happiness in my life, and I wanted to share those good things with others. Other people’s opinions about my choices didn’t matter; only God’s opinion mattered. And I knew God loved all of His children and wanted to help them and that He sent missionaries throughout the world to deliver this message for Him. Not everyone was interested in hearing that message, but that didn’t make it wrong for me to invite them to hear it. I had seen how much good came into people’s lives, including my own, when they did choose to listen and change their lives to follow God.

That was not the end of my difficulties talking to people I didn’t know, but it was the beginning of my learning that other people’s opinions don’t define truth and that I should stop giving others so much power over how I feel and see myself. God’s expectations of me are the only ones that matter. And it was significant to me that even when it was difficult for me to meet God’s expectations of me due to my weaknesses, God neither condemned me, nor lowered His expectations of me. Instead, He waited patiently for me to work up the courage to make another valiant attempt to meet His expectations, and as soon as I did, His Spirit was instantly there to support me.

I learned a lot about the nature of God on my mission. I learned that He does not hold grudges, that my weaknesses, far from offending Him, are things He has given me to help me learn to rely on Him and His power, and that He is infinitely more loving and patient than I could ever imagine. He is a Being worthy of worship. And I find myself singing His praises for allowing me to have the difficult experiences as a missionary that I needed to help me grow and develop into a better human being and a better disciple of Christ.

Feeling the Spirit

I know I haven’t written a blog post for a while. Last summer I joined an online writing community called Writers’ Village University (writersvillage.com), which I love, and a lot of my writing time has been spent doing writing assignments for the creative nonfiction classes I’ve been taking through WVU. The most recent piece I wrote for one of my classes I thought would be worth sharing here on my blog. I hope you enjoy!

Feeling the Spirit

“Did you feel the Spirit?” Dianna asked me. I stared at her like a deer caught in the headlights. It was my baptism day. I was eight years old and had just been baptized by my father. Following my baptism, my father and several other brethren from my church had stood in a circle around me with their hands on my head and given me the gift of the Holy Ghost. Apparently I was supposed to have felt something special during these ceremonies. But I just felt normal. I didn’t know how to tell Dianna that though. I dropped my eyes to the floor, mumbled something, and then ran off to play with my friends who had come to see my baptism. But her question continued to trouble me.

This idea of “feeling the Spirit” is emphasized a lot in my church. It seemed very important to learn how to do this, but I was at a loss. A lot of people seemed to cry when they got up in church to share their beliefs and feelings about God with everyone. I thought crying must have something to do with feeling the Spirit. But I never cried when I talked about God. A lot of people claimed to feel the Spirit when they went to the temple. I just felt anxious when I went there, terrified of forgetting what I was supposed to do and looking stupid. Some people talked about a warm feeling in their chest when they felt the Spirit. That had never happened to me. I got goosebumps sometimes. Was that the same thing?

These concerns about my apparent lack of feeling the Spirit followed me through all my growing up years. I felt like some sort of sham church member, doing all the things I was supposed to do, but never achieving this magical experience called feeling the Spirit. It wasn’t until I became a full-time missionary for my church for a season that I began to unravel this mystery of feeling the Spirit.

It turned out that, for me, the key to feeling the Spirit was recognizing when I was not feeling the Spirit. All this time I had been so worried about what the Spirit felt like, when, in reality, what I should have been focusing on was what the Spirit did not feel like.

It all started to click for me one day during a quarterly gathering of the missionaries in my area. My mission president’s wife spoke at this gathering, and one of the things she said was that, as missionaries, we didn’t have room in our hearts for feelings like self-doubt, self-blame, discouragement, etc.; all we had room for was faith, hope, and charity.

Something clicked for me in that moment. I realized that feelings like discouragement and frustration with myself did not make me feel motivated to try harder to be a better representative of Jesus Christ. Those feelings just made me want to shrink inside myself and give up. That’s not what God wanted me to do, and that meant those feelings were not from God or from His Spirit. Feeling faith and hope that Jesus Christ could help me overcome my weaknesses and that I could succeed in doing His work if I kept trying, those were feelings that motivated me to continue to work hard and reach out to others with love and be patient with myself; those were feelings that came from God and His Spirit.

It was like a brilliant light of understanding had suddenly burst upon my consciousness. My mind had been enlightened, joy and peace filled my soul—I had felt the Spirit. And it felt good. And I could see the way it was a contrast to the darkness of despair at my imperfections that I had been struggling with. And I began to see what Paul meant in his letter to the Galatians when he said “the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, temperance” (Galatians 5:22-23, KJV).

I had been feeling the Spirit all along, but until I contrasted it with the darkness that accompanies feelings that are not from God, I couldn’t see it. I was looking for something magical and exotic, outside the realm of normal emotions. What I discovered is that being able to recognize your emotions and their source and which emotions are helpful to you and which ones are not is its own kind of magic. The magic of feeling the Spirit, both its presence and its absence. I can now look someone in the eye and say with confidence that I have felt the Spirit, and it has changed my life.

Life Philosophies

There's a conversation Ted and I have had several times throughout our marriage. It's a discussion about the Rudy philosophy versus the It's a Wonderful Life philosophy. In the movie Rudy, Sean Astin’s character sacrifices everything to follow his dreams, while in the movie It's a Wonderful Life, Jimmy Stewart’s character sacrifices his dreams to fulfill family and community obligations. Which is the correct philosophy? Which is the worthier objective? Which is the more worthwhile sacrifice?

I realized that neither of these philosophies is a 100% correct philosophy for everyone all the time. Following your dreams at all costs can lead you to act selfishly and damage your relationships with others. Sacrificing too much of your own needs and desires to meet the desires and expectations of others can be unhealthy and can create unhealthy relationships.

The only philosophy that is true for everyone 100% of the time is the one contained in the following Bible verses: “And thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind, and with all thy strength, this is the first commandment. And the second is like, namely this, Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself. There is none other commandment greater than these” (Mark 12:30-31).

The only thing thing or person you're supposed to be willing to sacrifice everything for, all your heart, soul, mind and strength, is God. Not your dreams, not a cause, not your talents or career, not another person, not a material possession--only God. That’s the answer.

You may be asking, why is God the only one worthy of such a sacrifice? Because He is the only one who has already sacrificed everything for you. Jesus Christ paid the ultimate price of the atonement, took the pains, sicknesses, and sins of every single one of God’s children on Himself, which gave Him, and only Him, the power to save each of us and ensure our ultimate, eternal peace and happiness. He is the only one who knows the correct path for each of us to take in our life, what dreams, causes, relationships, and talents to pursue, to help us learn what we need to learn to reach our full potential, do the most good in this mortal life, and prepare for salvation in the next.

Sometimes we have the philosophy, my life will be complete when…(insert mortal experience that we think we have to have in order to be happy: marriage, children, career objective, material possession, etc.). This kind of philosophy can be a dangerous one. To think that your happiness requires some specific mortal experience or possession or achievement is foolish. Either you won't get it and you will think that you can't possibly be happy without it (and you can't be as long as your focus is all on that one thing--marriage, career, etc.), or you’ll get it and realize it has not brought you all the happiness you will ever need, and you’ll either keep trying to make it do that when it doesn't have the power to, or you’ll lose direction and meaning in your life (ex: Olympic athletes who win the gold and then don't know what to do with themselves after achieving that dream).

God’s plans and dreams for us, on the other hand, are with our eternal progress in mind, and each step we take on the path He has laid out for us brings us a step closer to an eternity of joy and increase. No experience we have here is a waste or a failure; every experience can teach us something that can draw us closer to God and help us become more like Him, which is our ultimate goal, and one we can never fully achieve in this life or without the Savior’s help. The more we choose to seek out and follow God’s plan for us, even, and perhaps especially, when it requires sacrifice, the more we will learn, and the more peace, joy, and love we will feel. God wants His children to be happy, and only by sacrificing our all to Him will we find the true, lasting happiness we are seeking, accomplish the things that are most important for us to accomplish, and become the people we have the potential to be.

Easter Sunday Gratitude

I know today is Easter, not Thanksgiving, but I am full of gratitude this Easter Sunday for all of the amazing blessings my Heavenly Father has given me. I am grateful for a wonderful husband and for our two beautiful children. I am grateful that my husband has a good job that he enjoys and that I am able to stay home and care for my children full-time. I am grateful for all the ways I have seen God's hand guiding our lives and our decisions for the future recently. And I am incredibly grateful for the atonement of Jesus Christ and for the power it gives me to repent and to become a better person each and every day. I know that with the help of the Savior I am able to accomplish more than I ever could on my own, and I'm so grateful for the love, comfort, strength and courage He gives me. I testify that He lives and that His selfless sacrifice puts salvation and eternal joy and peace within the grasp of every single one of God's children that chooses to follow Him and apply His atonement in their lives. I thank my Heavenly Father this day for the beautiful gift of His Son that makes miracles possible for all of us. Happy Easter!

The Lord's Perspective

I recently started studying the Book of Mormon from the beginning again, and I just finished the part where Lehi and Nephi each had their vision of the Tree of Life, and I’ve been pondering on the very different ways that Nephi and Laman and Lemuel responded to the words of their father Lehi, the prophet, about the vision he had. 

When Nephi hears his father's account of his vision, his reaction is to immediately go to the Lord in prayer and ask to receive his own personal witness of the things that his father saw and shared. As a result, he received his own vision of the Tree of Life and an explanation of the meaning of the different things which Lehi saw in his vision and gained his own personal testimony and understanding of the prophet Lehi’s words. 

Laman and Lemuel, on the other hand, upon hearing the words of their father, the prophet, did not go to the Lord in prayer for understanding and their own personal witness of the truth of his words, but instead began “disputing one with another concerning the things [their] father had spoken unto them” (1 Nephi 15:2).

Nephi explains that Lehi “truly spake many great things unto them, which were hard to be understood, save a man should inquire of the Lord…” (1 Nephi 15:3)

This is often true of the words of the Lord and His servants. As Jesus explain to Pilate in John 18:36, “My kingdom is not of this world,” and as He says in the Old Testament in Isaiah 55:8-9, “my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts.”

The Lord sees everything from an eternal perspective, while we see things from a finite, mortal, worldly perspective. It makes sense that in order to understand the words of the Lord, we must turn to Him and get help from the Holy Ghost to see and understand things from His greater eternal perspective.

When Nephi approaches his brothers and asks what they are disputing about, and they explain the words their father spoke that they did not understand, the very first thing Nephi says in response to their questions is, “Have ye inquired of the Lord?” (1 Nephi 15:8)

Laman and Lemuel’s response is, “We have not; for the Lord maketh no such thing known unto us” (1 Nephi 15:9).

Nephi reminds his brothers of the promise of the Lord: “If ye will not harden your hearts, and ask me in faith, believing that ye shall receive, with diligence in keeping my commandments, surely these things shall be made known unto you” (1 Nephi 15:11).

Nephi is teaching his brothers that other weak, fallible mortals are not the people they should be going to for greater understanding of the words of the Lord or His prophets; they should be going to the Lord Himself, the source of all knowledge and truth.

There seems to be a growing trend in society that when our modern day prophet and apostles say something that “is hard to be understood,” like the words that Lehi spoke to his family after receiving revelation from the Lord, people’s first reaction is to jump on Facebook and dispute one with another about the words of the Brethren like Laman and Lemuel rather than turn to the Lord in prayer for personal confirmation and understanding like Nephi.

As Nephi explains to Laman and Lemuel, disputations with other people about the Lord’s or His servants’ words is not an effective way of arriving at truth. You must personally go to the Lord Himself and ask with a sincere heart and real intent, with faith that He will answer you and with a willing heart to act on the answer you receive, whatever it is.

I think one of the biggest things that I have noticed that trip people up in following the Lord and His servants is that they have a bigger testimony of certain social agendas that are important to them than they do of the Lord’s prophet and apostles and their calling as prophets, seers, and revelators. They are convinced that their social agenda is equally as important to the Lord as it is to them and that the Lord has the same opinions as they do about the best way to bring it about. Therefore, if the words or actions of the prophet and apostles do not seem to further the cause of their social agenda(s), they have a difficult time believing that those words or decisions could possibly have come from the Lord, who obviously wants social justice just as much as they do and has that as His top priority in everything He does.

I think there is a false belief here that is the cause of so much of the confusion and dissent among members of Christ’s Church. Is social justice important to God? Of course it is. Would God prefer that all His children treat one another with kindness, respect and love and see each other as equally important in His eyes? Of course He would. Is it good for us to strive for greater social justice in our society? Of course it is. However, even though God loves all of His children equally and believes in social justice, I do not think that social justice is His top priority. 

Think of Christ’s mortal ministry. The Jews were convinced that when the Messiah came His top priority would be the same as theirs: to free them from Roman rule. But that was not what Christ did when He came, which is why so many of the Jews had trouble recognizing Him. Christ’s top priority was not their social agenda of being freed from Roman rule. His top priority was something with much greater eternal significance than any social injustices His people were experiencing in mortality. His top priority was, and still is, the eternal salvation of God’s children, and that can be achieved whether or not God’s children experience social injustices during their time on earth. 

We have power to hurt one another during our time here in mortality, but our power to truly harm one another in any way that is eternally significant is actually incredibly limited. We can enslave each other, discriminate against others for one reason or another, do physical harm to one another, say hurtful words to each other, but we have no power over how others choose to respond to our treatment of them. We cannot stop them from continuing to make good choices about how they treat those around them, from finding peace by forgiving us for our harsh treatment of them, from turning to the Lord for love and healing that transcends any amount of harm we could possibly do to them, from choosing to keep commandments and follow the Lord’s will for them in their lives and gain eternal salvation. No matter what we do, other people and the choices that will affect their eternal salvation are out of our reach. We have the power to make others’ journey through mortality more or less pleasant, to help or hinder them on their path to eternal salvation, but ultimately we cannot stop them from turning to the Lord for the love, healing, knowledge and strength necessary to achieve their eternal goal and reach their divine potential, if that is their true desire.

Indeed, challenging circumstances in mortality are often what lead people to humble themselves and turn to the Lord for help when they have nowhere else to turn. When others are cruel to them or do not meet their needs, they learn to rely on the Lord’s love and strength instead of trying to rely on other imperfect people who will always end up letting them down in one way or another. By humbling ourselves and turning to the Lord in our distress and committing to follow His will for us, we are able to feel a peace that transcends the horror of even the very worst of mortal circumstances.

So, while it is good and right for us to treat others the way Christ would and for society to encourage and give everyone the opportunity to achieve their greatest potential during their mortal life, what is most important to the Lord is that His children achieve their greatest eternal potential, and that can only be accomplished if they know the truth of who God is and of the plan He has prepared for them to gain salvation. It is the primary responsibility of the Lord’s servants to teach these truths that are most important for the eternal progress of God’s children. 

When we do our best to act in accordance with God’s laws and use the power of the atonement in our lives, we can continue to learn and grow and progress on our path to eternal life, irrespective of how others are trying to oppress us or limit our potential in this world. We can find peace and joy and a testimony of our eternal and divine worth as we apply God’s teachings in our lives and grow closer to Him. No one has the power to take that away from us when we have a true understanding of who God is and who we are as His children and of the ordinances and other tools God has put in place to allow us to unlock the powers of heaven in our individual lives. 

Without sufficient knowledge of God, His eternal plan for us, and how to access His love and power in our lives, however, we are much more likely to allow the difficulties of this mortal life to lead us to despair rather than to learning and growth. That’s why God places knowledge of eternal truths and of His plan of salvation for His children as His top priority. Rather than trying to achieve a heaven-like existence for His children in mortality, He uses the inequalities and other challenges of mortal life to refine and teach His children the lessons they must learn to qualify for life with Him in heaven after this mortal existence. This refining process includes a lot of lessons on compassion, patience, and forgiveness towards those who treat us poorly in mortality as they also struggle to learn to become more like Christ, achieve their divine potential, and qualify for heaven. We can't control how other people treat us, but we can control how we respond, and that is the true test of mortality and of the people we are becoming as we learn to rely on the Lord and His great love and wisdom.

Back to the story of Nephi and his brothers in 1 Nephi chapter 15. After first teaching his brothers the importance of turning to the Lord when they have questions, Nephi proceeds to address some of his brothers’ confusion about the meaning of their father’s vision using the knowledge he gained from the Lord during his own vision. 

The question that Nephi gets the most passionate about when teaching his brothers is when they ask what the rod of iron that led to the Tree of Life represented. Nephi explains that the rod of iron in the vision “was the word of God; and whoso would hearken unto the word of God, and would hold fast unto it, they would never perish; neither could the temptations and the fiery darts of the adversary overpower them unto blindness, to lead them away to destruction” (1 Nephi 15:24). After Nephi explains this, he then begins to exhort his brethren “with all the energies of [his] soul, and with all the faculty which [he] possessed, that they would give heed to the word of God and remember to keep his commandments always in all things” (1 Nephi 15:25).

Nephi knows that it is by continually  hearkening to and applying the word of God in our lives that we will be protected from Satan and his temptations and lies that can blind us and lead us to destruction. That is why it is so important to study the word of God in the scriptures, listen to the words given to Christ’s current prophet and apostles to speak, and seek the Lord in prayer to understand these words and how He would like us to apply them in each of our individual lives. If we hold fast to God’s words and keep the commandments He has revealed to His prophets, both anciently and in our day, we will be supported in all the trials and suffering of this mortal life, feel God’s immense love for us and the peace and healing only He can give, and be brought safely home to live with Him again after this life. Eternal life is God’s most important goal for us, and it should be our top priority as well, and hearkening to and seeking to understand the words of God and His eternal plan and perspective are what will help us achieve this primary purpose of mortality. I share these things with you in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

How Can You Feel Grateful In All Things and At All Times?

I was reading over a talk I gave in church a little over a year ago, not too long after we moved to Heber, and I decided it would be a good thing to share on my blog. Here it is.

November 9, 2014
TOPIC: Gratitude in all things and at all times

The topic I was assigned for my talk today is "gratitude in all things and at all times." So, the question is, “How can we feel gratitude even when we are facing trials and difficult times in our lives? What is the source of this gratitude that transcends the suffering we sometimes experience here in mortality?

People often joke that they have read the first verse of the Book of Mormon, 1 Nephi 1:1, more times than any other verse in the Book of Mormon. If you start reading the Book of Mormon and that’s as far as you get, you’ve actually already learned quite a bit from the very wise prophet Nephi. Let’s take a look at that first verse: 

I, Nephi, having been born of goodly parents, therefore I was taught somewhat in all the learning of my father; 

• Nephi had good parents who taught him well, which is very important, but this next part is the part I want to focus on:

and having seen many afflictions in the course of my days, nevertheless, having been highly favored of the Lord in all my days; 

• This sounds like a contradiction. How can you both have many afflictions and at the same time be highly favored of the Lord? We know Nephi did indeed experience many afflictions in his days. He had to leave his home in Jerusalem and all his possessions, travel in the wilderness for a long time where sometimes food was scarce, his older brothers hated him and tried to kill him multiple times. And yet, although Nephi acknowledges that he’s seen many afflictions in the course of his days, in the same breath he says that he has been highly favored of the Lord in all his days. It seems like Nephi has figured it out, how to be grateful even in hard times. Let's keep reading and see if he gives us any clues to this secret. Nephi goes on to say:

yea, having had a great knowledge of the goodness and the mysteries of God,therefore I make a record of my proceedings in my days. 

• Nephi feels blessed and highly favored of the Lord because of his knowledge of the goodness and the mysteries of God
• We often think that there are certain things we need in order to feel happy and blessed in our lives: maybe we think we need a nice home, or to get into the college that we want, or to get a certain job that we want, or to get married, or for our kids to behave and make good choices, or for our health to improve
• Nephi is teaching us that it is knowledge of God and His goodness and of eternal truths that brings us peace and hope in the midst of affliction, that allows us to feel greatly blessed, no matter our circumstances. 

How can knowledge of God and His goodness help us in times of trial? 

President Uchtdorf tells us that "Being grateful in our circumstances is an act of faith in God. It requires that we trust God and hope for things we may not see but which are true." He says that "True gratitude is an expression of hope and testimony" (“Grateful in Any Circumstances, Ensign May 2014).

Trusting God is something that I've struggled with a lot in my life. Most recently, this last spring when Ted was getting ready to graduate from USU and was looking for a job, I struggled to trust God in the face of so much change and uncertainty in our future. We had been living in Logan for four years, and I had made a lot of friends and gotten quite comfortable with our life there. I was afraid of having to start over somewhere new where I didn't know anyone. I was pretty sure what I needed to be happy, to live close to people that I loved, and I was afraid that God wasn't going to let me. I didn't feel that I could be grateful unless He did, unless the outcome of Ted's job hunt looked the way I wanted it to look. My struggles with all the changes in my life finally pushed me to humble myself enough to realize that I needed to change the focus of my life. I needed to rely on God and His love to meet my needs, not on other people. When I stopped focusing so much on specific people in my life and my fear of losing them, I was able to see that God had been right there beside me the whole time, but I had been too distracted to notice because I was holding on so tightly to the things I thought I needed to be happy instead of relying on Him and trusting His greater wisdom and knowledge to guide my life. Once I was able to recognize my weakness in this area and work to change and make God and His will the center of my life and trust Him to take care of me, I was able to feel so much more peace.

We are here on earth to gain knowledge and experience and to become like God. For me, the true learning began when I recognized that the way I was going about trying to secure my own happiness was not working. I had a plan, and my plan was not giving me the results I wanted. Realizing that I actually didn't have any idea what I really needed to be happy, that my plan was actually causing me way more suffering than just following God's plan, humbled me enough that I was finally able to say, "Okay, God, you're right. You know best. I thought I knew what I needed to be happy, but I was wrong. I will do things your way. You know what I need to find joy and peace, and I don't. I am ready to accept your plan for my life and trust you to take care of me."

What is it that we actually need to find true joy and peace in our lives? If it isn’t other people or power or possessions, then what is the source of that joy and peace that is available to us even in hard times, when nothing in life seems to be going well? In his famous dream of the Tree of Life, the prophet Lehi finds himself in “a dark and dreary waste” (1 Nephi 8:7). After traveling many hours in darkness, Lehi prays to the Lord for help and relief. It is then that he sees what Lehi describes as “a tree, whose fruit was desirable to make one happy. And it came to pass,” Lehi says, “that I did go forth and partake of the fruit thereof; and I beheld that it was most sweet, above all that I ever before tasted...And as I partook of the fruit thereof it filled my soul with exceedingly great joy…” (1 Nephi 8:10-12). Later we learn that the fruit that Lehi ate represents “the love of God, which sheddeth itself abroad in the hearts of the children of men" and "is the most desirable above all things...and the most joyous to the soul" (1 Nephi 11:21-23). 

God's love - that is the true source of joy and peace. And the great thing is that God's love is something that we can have access to at anytime, no matter what or who else is in our lives. At the time that we make our very first covenant with God, at baptism, our Heavenly Father gives us a great gift, the gift of the Holy Ghost. We learn from Paul in his letter to the Galatians that the fruit of the Spirit includes love, joy and peace (Galatians 5:22). The Holy Ghost helps us feel God's love for us when we are living righteously. Paul also tells us in his letter to the Romans that nothing can separate us from the love of God, not tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword, nor death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature - nothing (Romans 8:35, 38-39). Paul says that "in all these things we are more than conquerors through him that loved us" (Romans 8:37). Jesus Christ and His atonement have the power to heal all of our wounds and to purify us of all our sins and weaknesses. What a great blessing this is, and what a reason to be full of gratitude to a loving and merciful Heavenly Father who will not leave us alone in times of distress and who is willing to forgive us time and time again and has a wonderful plan to help us return to Him and gain eternal joy and peace in His loving presence. 

When we gain a true understanding and testimony of God and His goodness and mercy and love, we are able to trust Him, to know in hard times that He is there to help us and that by following His perfect plan a bright future awaits us, that all our sorrows will ultimately be swallowed up in the love of our Redeemer. We know that God will never give up on us or on our loved ones and that His greatest desire is to bring us all safely home to Him and that He will not rest until He has given us every opportunity to make that choice and achieve that glorious objective. 

At the last General Women’s Meeting, Sister Marriott, the second counselor in the YW presidency, shared an experience where during a struggle in her life she turned to the Lord and was able to have her testimony strengthened and her burden lightened as she came to a greater understanding of herself and of her relationship with the Lord. Sister Marriott recounted:

“Some years ago our family encountered a major challenge. I went to the temple and there prayed earnestly for help. I was given a moment of truth. I received a clear impression of my weaknesses, and I was shocked. In that spiritually instructive moment, I saw a prideful woman doing things her own way, not necessarily the Lord’s way, and privately taking credit for any so-called accomplishment. I knew I was looking at myself. I cried out in my heart to Heavenly Father and said, “I don’t want to be that woman, but how do I change?”

Through the pure spirit of revelation in the temple, I was taught of my utter need for a Redeemer. I turned immediately to the Savior Jesus Christ in my thoughts and felt my anguish melt away and a great hope spring up in my heart. He was my only hope, and I longed to cling only to Him. It was clear to me that a self-absorbed natural woman “is an enemy to God” and to people in her sphere of influence. In the temple that day I learned it was only through the Atonement of Jesus Christ that my prideful nature could change and that I would be enabled to do good. I felt His love keenly, and I knew He would teach me by the Spirit and change me if I gave my heart to Him, holding back nothing.”

Sister Marriott continued, “I still fight my weaknesses, but I trust in the divine help of the Atonement. This pure instruction came because I entered the holy temple, seeking relief and answers. I entered the temple burdened, and I left knowing I had an all-powerful and all-loving Savior. I was lighter and joyful because I had received His light and accepted His plan for me” (“Sharing Your Light,” Ensign November 2014).

Notice in this example that going to the temple did not make the major challenge in the life of Sister Marriott and her family go away. However, recognizing her weaknesses and calling upon Jesus Christ for help to change allowed Sister Marriott to feel God’s love for her and gain confidence in His ability and willingness to help her and her family achieve their divine potential and the eternal joy He desired for them.

When life seems hard and we feel that we are surrounded by darkness and despair, like Lehi in his dream, sometimes it can be really hard to find Christ’s light and God’s love in the darkness. How do we get out of dark emotional places to a place of gratitude?

When we are in dark places, Satan would love for us to stay there. He is the one that gives us feelings of discouragement and despair, tries to convince us that we are worthless and can never change or accomplish anything good and that our lives are terrible and will never get better. Those feelings do not come from the Spirit. You can tell because they do not motivate you to do good, they just paralyze you. The Spirit gives you feelings of hope and faith that you can change and improve with Christ's help and that God is taking care of you and life will get better. I’ve noticed that it's easier to feel the Spirit in my life when I am pushing forward, making goals, and working to make good things happen in my life and in the lives of others, rather than just sitting around contemplating the things in my life that make me sad or that I wish were different. Like Lehi, often we need to call on the Lord for help to find the light in the darkness. 

When I was struggling with all the changes in my life and trying to change my focus and gain a more eternal perspective on things, I prayed to know what my new focus should be in my life. What I had been focusing on hadn’t been working well for me, so I didn’t want to focus on that anymore, but I needed something to replace it with, something that was worthwhile and that I felt good about. I had just recently had my son Sam and quit working, and I needed to know what my life should be about besides nursing and changing diapers. I decided to read my patriarchal blessing with this question in mind: What should I be doing with my life right now? How should I be using my time? It was like God had just been waiting for me to ask that question. As I read my blessing, I received so much inspiration about what things God expected me to accomplish and work on at this time in my life. I received so many ideas about ways I could use my talents to help build God’s kingdom. It was amazing. And as I worked to implement these ideas, I felt God’s love more in my life and gratitude that I could use my strengths to help bless others’ lives in ways that worked well for me during this new stage in my life.

As I mentioned earlier, the main purpose of this life is to learn how to become like God. That's why we're here. No matter what is happening in our lives, if it is helping us to grow and to seek answers and truth and to change and to become better and stronger and to trust in the Lord more deeply and feel His love more strongly, then we are succeeding in obtaining the treasure we came to earth to find. Struggles help us to be humble and to recognize our need for a Savior and to seek to learn the lessons He is trying to teach us. Lots of times we want to say, "Oh, I'm good. I'm as good as I want to be, I've got all the blessings I need, I don't need to learn anything else.” God loves us too much to let us sell ourselves short though. He knows what experiences we need to become who we need to be to qualify for celestial glory, and He will not settle for any less joy than that for His children. He lets us go through hard things because He knows we need those experiences to be purified and molded and shaped into the best people we can be and to receive the greatest amount of joy in the next life and throughout eternity.

Gratitude comes when we recognize our great need for a Savior and come to know personally that He loves us in spite of all our weaknesses and mistakes and that He is willing to forgive us and bless us as we turn to Him and repent and try to change. His great patience with us as we continue to stumble and fall again and again as we try to become better and more like Him is what creates a spirit of gratitude in our hearts.

Adam and Eve felt this great gratitude in their hearts when, after partaking of the forbidden fruit and facing the consequences of their choice of being cast out of the Garden of Eden and out of God’s presence, they were told that their Heavenly Father had prepared a Savior for them who was willing to suffer for their sins and give His life so they could have the opportunity to return to God’s presence and feel His great love for them again. They were eager to make covenants with their Father and live their lives by those covenants for the opportunity to have that great blessing.

Ammon, the son of Mosiah, and the prophet Joseph Smith both have beautiful chapters where they praise God in joyful gratitude for His great mercy and longsuffering towards the children of men and His eagerness to forgive us and bless us and bring us home. 

In Alma 26, starting in verse 11, Ammon says: “...behold, my joy is full, yea, my heart is brim with joy, and I will rejoice in my God.” Jumping down to verse 14: “Yea, we have reason to praise him forever, for he is the Most High God, and has loosed our brethren from the chains of hell. Yea, they were encircled about with everlasting darkness and destruction; but behold, he has brought them into his everlasting light, yea, into everlasting salvation; and they are encircled about with the matchless bounty of his love; yea, and we have been instruments in his hands of doing this great and marvelous work. Therefore, let us glory, yea, we will glory in the Lord; yea, we will rejoice, for our joy is full; yea, we will praise our God forever. Behold, who can glory too much in the Lord? Yea, who can say too much of his great power, and of his mercy, and of his long-suffering towards the children of men? Behold, I say unto you, I cannot say the smallest part which I feel. Who could have supposed that our God would have been so merciful as to have snatched us from our awful, sinful, and polluted state? Behold, we went forth even in wrath, with mighty threatenings to destroy his church. Oh then, why did he not consign us to an awful destruction, yea, why did he not let the sword of his justice fall upon us, and doom us to eternal despair?....Behold, he did not exercise his justice upon us, but in his great mercy hath brought us over that everlasting gulf of death and misery, even to the salvation of our souls….Now have we not reason to rejoice? Yea, I say unto you, there never were men that had so great reason to rejoice as we, since the world began; yea, and my joy is carried away, even unto boasting in my God; for he has all power, all wisdom, and all understanding; he comprehendeth all things, and he is a merciful Being, even unto salvation, to those who will repent and believe on his name. Now if this is boasting, even so will I boast; for this is my life and my light, my joy and my salvation, and my redemption from everlasting wo....Now my brethren, we see that God is mindful of every people, whatsoever land they may be in; yea, he numbereth his people, and his bowels of mercy are over all the earth. Now this is my joy, and my great thanksgiving; yea, and I will give thanks unto my God forever. Amen.”

What a beautiful tribute to an all-loving, all-powerful, all-merciful Heavenly Father. Joseph Smith also gives witness to the greatness of our God and His gospel and the great blessing we have to be children of God and to know His plan for us in D&C 128:19, 22-23:

“Now, what do we hear in the gospel which we have received? A voice of gladness! A voice of mercy from heaven; and a voice of truth out of the earth; glad tidings for the dead; a voice of gladness for the living and the dead; glad tidings of great joy. How beautiful upon the mountains are the feet of those that bring glad tidings of good things, and that say unto Zion: Behold, thy God reigneth!....Let your hearts rejoice, and be exceedingly glad. Let the earth break forth into singing. Let the dead speak forth anthems of eternal praise to the King Immanuel, who hath ordained, before the world was, that which would enable us to redeem them out of their prison; for the prisoners shall go free. Let the mountains shout for joy, and all ye valleys cry aloud; and all ye seas and dry lands tell the wonders of your Eternal King! And ye rivers, and brooks, and rills, flow down with gladness. Let the woods and all the trees of the field praise the Lord; and ye solid rocks weep for joy! And let the sun, moon, and the morning stars sing together, and let all the sons of God shout for joy! And let the eternal creations declare his name forever and ever! And again I say, how glorious is the voice we hear from heaven, proclaiming in our ears, glory, and salvation, and honor, and immortality, and eternal life; kingdoms, principalities, and powers!”

God’s plan for His children is amazing, and we can be eternally grateful for His love and wisdom and mercy towards us and His great desire to make a glorious future possible for us. This is the difficult part of our journey towards Godhood, but the blessings we will receive as we press forward and endure to the end will be greater than we could ever imagine. Paul tells us in Romans 8:18 “that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us.”

I know that we have a Heavenly Father who knows and loves each of us dearly and knows what experiences we need to return to live with Him again and have an eternal peace and joy that will never be taken from us. I know that we have a Savior, Jesus Christ, who suffered for all our pain and sins so that we might repent and be forgiven and receive all the blessings God has to bestow on His precious children. I know that we are here on earth to learn, and that the experiences we have will help us become perfected as we turn to the Savior for help and comfort and allow the Spirit to teach us important eternal truths through our sorrows and struggles. I know that we can trust our Father to take care of us and our loved ones, to give us the strength and comfort we need to carry on, and to guide us home to His ever-loving presence. I know that all wrongs in this life can and will be made right through the Atonement and that all wounds will be healed. What a huge blessing this is. My heart is full of gratitude for my Heavenly Father and for my Savior, His Only Begotten Son, Jesus Christ. I am grateful for their love and wisdom and mercy and their great patience with me and my weaknesses as I seek to learn and grow and become more like them. I am grateful that They never give up on me, no matter how many times I stumble or fall short. I know that they will take care of me and that they will take care of you. You can trust Them. Give your burdens to the Lord and let Him sustain you during the hard times. Pray for an eternal perspective, to feel joy and peace from the Spirit, and to gain your own testimony that “all things work together for good to them that love God” (Romans 8:28).

D&C 42:61

If thou shalt ask, thou shalt receive revelation upon revelation, knowledge upon knowledge, that thou mayest know the mysteries and peaceable things—that which bringeth joy, that which bringeth life eternal.

And you will always have reason to be grateful and to rejoice. I say these things, in the name of my Savior, Jesus Christ, Amen.

The True Source of Joy and Peace

I recently read these verses in Helaman chapter 3 in the Book of Mormon, and something different stood out to me as I read them this time:

Helaman 3:33-35 (Book of Mormon)

33 And in the fifty and first year of the reign of the judges there was peace also, save it were the pride which began to enter into the church--not into the church of God, but into the hearts of the people who professed to belong to the church of God--

34 And they were lifted up in pride, even to the persecution of many of their brethren. Now this was a great evil, which did cause the more humble part of the people to suffer great persecutions, and to wade through much affliction.

35 Nevertheless they did fast and pray oft, and did wax stronger and stronger in their humility, and firmer and firmer in the faith of Christ, unto the filling their souls with joy and consolation, yea, even to the purifying and the sanctification of their hearts, which sanctification cometh because of their yielding their hearts unto God.

What struck me as the most interesting in these verses is how "the more humble part of the people" who were being persecuted chose to respond in the face of this completely unjustified persecution from other members of Christ's Church. Those being persecuted were completely innocent victims of those persecuting them; the "great evil" done by their persecutors was causing the persecuted to suffer and "to wade through much affliction," all at the hands of those who should have been the most ready to love and support them as fellow disciples of Christ. But the persecutors had succumbed to the weakness of pride and completely lost their way, and the more humble part of the people was suffering for it. 

So what did they do? Did they leave the church of God where they were being treated so poorly by those who professed to follow Christ? Did they lash out at their persecutors? Surprisingly, they resorted to neither of these seemingly justified courses of action. Instead, the scripture says that they turned to the Lord in fasting and prayer in the face of these persecutions, waxing "stronger and stronger in their humility, and firmer and firmer in the faith of Christ," which led "to the purifying and the sanctification of their hearts" as they "yield[ed] their hearts unto God" and to "the filling [of] their souls with joy and consolation." 

There are a couple of things about these people's response to persecution and its results that I find amazing. The first thing is that when faced with the completely unjust and evil actions of others, the more humble part of the people did not spend their time pointing out the sins of their oppressors, but instead used these difficult circumstances as an opportunity to look inwards, to purify and sanctify their own hearts, to become more Christlike themselves as they suffered these persecutions and to allow the Lord to teach them through their trials. 

The second thing I find amazing is that by purifying and sanctifying their own hearts through fasting and prayer and by yielding their hearts unto God and remaining faithful in the face of bitter persecution, the more humble part of the people found that their faith in Christ grew and that their souls were filled with joy and consolation. NOTHING in their circumstances had changed, but in the midst of their afflictions, they felt joy and consolation. What an amazing gift from the Savior to His long-suffering, faithful followers. 

I have experienced in my own life the joy and peace that comes from yielding my heart unto God. I have seen personally how purifying and sanctifying my own heart through fervent prayer and reliance on the Savior and His Spirit and Atonement can turn my sorrow and suffering into joy and peace, even when nothing in my circumstances has changed. I know the Lord can replace feelings of hurt and suffering with feelings of joy and peace and forgiveness when we turn to Him and seek to find and do His will. I can bear witness of the truth of Christ's words to His disciples in John 14:27:

27 Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.

When we choose to follow Christ and take His yoke upon us, we will find indeed that "[His] yoke is easy and [His] burden is light" (Matthew 11:30) and that our hearts need never be troubled or afraid. I bear my personal witness of these things and that Christ is the true source of the joy and peace we seek here and hereafter and that no other creature or circumstance can separate us from Him and the joy and peace He offers all those who faithfully follow Him. In the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

Easter Message: The Act and Purpose of Crying Repentance

I've been thinking about repentance, and more specifically about the act of calling people to repentance. Prophets do that a lot in the scriptures, as did Christ when He was on the earth, as did His apostles then, and as do His prophet and apostles on the earth today. All disciples of Christ, in fact, have a responsibility to teach and bear witness of Christ and of the truth of His gospel and to invite people to come unto Christ and repent.

Most of the time, we tend to focus on the wrong part of the process of calling people to repentance. We get all hung up on the fact that someone is telling us or others that they are doing something wrong. The only thing we see is that we are being judged and condemned.

The whole point of telling people they are doing something wrong is not to condemn them. The whole point in telling them is so they can change and start making choices that will bring them greater peace and happiness. If God's goal was to condemn us, He would just let us keep making bad choices and not bother telling us which choices would actually make us the most happy in the long-term. He wants us to be happy and achieve our greatest potential though. That's the whole reason He sends prophets and apostles to teach us and why He sent His Son to perform the atonement: so we can change. So we can repent and be forgiven and make the choices that will allow us to become like God and return to His presence and partake of the same eternal joy and increase that He enjoys.

There are so many good examples in the scriptures of God trying to teach people this concept. Take the story of Cain, for example. Cain and his brother Abel both offer God a sacrifice. Abel's sacrifice follows the laws of sacrifice that God taught to Adam and Eve and is accepted. Cain's sacrifice does not follow the laws of sacrifice laid down by the Lord and is rejected. Cain gets upset that his offering was not accepted. This is the Lord's response to Cain:

Genesis 4:6-7 (Bible, King James version)
6 And the Lord said unto Cain, Why art thou wroth? and why is thy countenance fallen?
7 If thou doest well, shalt thou not be accepted? and if thou doest not well, sin lieth at the door.”

God explains to Cain that getting all upset about having his offering rejected is unnecessary and even counterproductive. All he needs to do is change and do well, follow the Lord’s instructions, and his offering will be accepted. God’s response to his imperfect offering is an opportunity to learn and change, not a punishment or evidence that God is playing favorites. God is teaching His son Cain about choices and consequences. Cain has control over what choices he makes, but he does not have control over the consequences of those choices. God wants to make sure Cain clearly understands the consequences that come with each choice, which choices have good consequences and which choices have bad consequences, so he can choose wisely. He also wants Cain to know that if he makes a wrong choice, all is not lost; all he needs to do is change and make a better choice the next time.

That's the message of Easter. It is a joyful message that, thanks to Christ's atonement, all is not lost, no matter what we have done or how many poor choices we have made. God doesn't care how long it takes us to learn to choose well. All He cares about is that we start heading in the right direction now.

The Lord teaches this concept again in the Old Testament to the prophet Ezekial.

Ezekial 18:20-32 (Bible, King James version)
20 The soul that sinneth, it shall die. The son shall not bear the iniquity of the father, neither shall the father bear the iniquity of the son: the righteousness of the righteous shall be upon him, and the wickedness of the wicked shall be upon him.
21 But if the wicked will turn from all his sins that he hath committed, and keep all my statutes, and do that which is lawful and right, he shall surely live, he shall not die.
22 All his transgressions that he hath committed, they shall not be mentioned unto him: in his righteousness that he hath done he shall live.
23 Have I any pleasure at all that the wicked should die? saith the Lord God: and not that he should return from his ways, and live?
24 But when the righteous turneth away from his righteousness, and committeth iniquity, and doeth according to all the abominations that the wicked man doeth, shall he live? All his righteousness that he hath done shall not be mentioned: in his trespass that he hath trespassed, and in his sin that he hath sinned, in them shall he die.
25 Yet ye say, The way of the Lord is not equal. Hear now, O house of Israel; Is not my way equal? are not your ways unequal?
26 When a righteous man turneth away from his righteousness, and committeth iniquity, and dieth in them; for his iniquity that he hath done shall he die.
27 Again, when the wicked man turneth away from his wickedness that he hath committed, and doeth that which is lawful and right, he shall save his soul alive.
28 Because he considereth, and turneth away from all his transgressions that he hath committed, he shall surely live, he shall not die.
29 Yet saith the house of Israel, The way of the Lord is not equal. O house of Israel, are not my ways equal? are not your ways unequal?
30 Therefore I will judge you, O house of Israel, every one according to his ways, saith the Lord God. Repent, and turn yourselves from all your transgressions; so iniquity shall not be your ruin.
31 Cast away from you all your transgressions, whereby ye have transgressed; and make you a new heart and a new spirit: for why will ye die, O house of Israel?
32 For I have no pleasure in the death of him that dieth, saith the Lord God: wherefore turn yourselves, and live ye.

The Lord is again explaining the consequences of righteous choices versus wicked choices, between choices that will ultimately bring us eternal joy and choices that will ultimately bring us sorrow, regret and misery. The Lord emphasizes the point that He takes no pleasure in the death or separation from Him of His children who choose poorly. His greatest desire is for them to repent, change, and start making good choices so that they can live with Him again in eternal joy. He asks His children, why will ye die? Why do you insist on making choices that will not bring you happiness? I do not choose that for you. I have no desire for you to have negative consequences. That's why I send my prophets to teach you and my Son to atone for you. I want life and happiness for you. Please repent and choose well and come back to me. I leave you the choice, but I will do everything in my power to give you the opportunity to make the choice to do well and come home to me.

It is not God's desire to condemn His children that motivates Him to send prophets and missionaries to call people to repentance; it is His desire to extend mercy to His children that motivates Him. He wants all of His children to clearly understand the consequences of the choices they are making so that they have the power to choose wisely. He also wants them to know the joyful message that through the suffering and sacrifice of His perfect Son, they have the opportunity to be washed clean from past sins and mistakes and the power to change and become like God and partake of eternal joy with Him. That is the glorious message of Easter. Christ lives, and so can we. The choice is ours. May we listen to the voices of God's messengers and choose wisely. I leave you this Easter message in the name of our Savior, Jesus Christ, amen.

P.S. This year, Easter weekend is the same weekend as the semi-annual General Conference of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, when the current prophet and 12 apostles chosen by Jesus Christ to lead His church in our day will speak and give us counsel and direction they have received from the Lord through His Spirit. Stream it for free on lds.org on Saturday and Easter Sunday! There will be many great messages about the Savior and how we can apply His teachings in our lives! The meetings are at 10AM and 2PM MST both Saturday and Sunday. Recordings of the meetings will also be available afterwards if you don't catch them live. Happy Easter!

Purging Myself of False Beliefs

A lot of the learning I have done over the last several months has involved purging myself of false beliefs. A useful skill I have developed during my learning process is tracing my emotions back to the belief that triggered them, and then deciding if that belief is true or false and whether I still want to believe it or not. When you can find the source of your emotions, it gives you the power to change them and makes you feel like much less of a victim. Here are some of the false beliefs I have discovered and had to purge myself of so far:

1. Life is about spending time with people you love. This is false. This is a great perk to life, but it is not what life is about. Life is about learning to become like God and helping others do the same. It’s about using the talents I have been given to build God's kingdom on the earth and bless others' lives and become better in the process. I can't just center my life on others and live their life instead of my own, like I have a tendency to do with people I love a lot. Like Christ explains in His parable of the talents (Matthew 25:14-30), I can't bury or neglect my own talents; I have to use my time here on earth wisely and make my own plans and goals to improve myself and bless others, not just hang around cool people and expect them to make me happy and save me instead of the Savior. This is not the path to lasting joy and fulfillment. I have to put God and loving and serving Him first. I often get in trouble by switching up those first two commandments. The first commandment is “Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind” and the second is “Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself” (Matthew 22:36-40). When I start loving others with all my heart, soul and mind and keep God at a distance, that’s when I get into trouble. It was a little tricky to figure this false belief out, because loving other people is a good thing, but when I put loving other people before loving and serving God, my life starts to get out of balance and the peace and joy that comes from having my will aligned with the Lord’s is missing.
   
   
2. I can control how others feel about me. This is also false. I realized that in my life I’ve always tried to do everything “right” so that people would have no excuse not to like me. I thought that if I was nice and thoughtful and serviceable enough, I could control the way other people felt about me. This is not true. It doesn't matter how nice or thoughtful or serviceable I am: I can't make someone love me more than they choose to love me or give me more in the relationship than they choose to give. As evidenced by the life of the Savior, even if I was a perfect person and did everything perfectly, people could still choose not to like me. And I am far from perfect. I have to let other people make their own choices about whether they want to love me in spite of my imperfections and weaknesses. I need to stop loving and serving others with strings attached, trying to obligate other people to love, protect and take care of me by offering them martyr-like service instead of setting appropriate boundaries on what I am willing to do and allowing others to set their own boundaries. People don't like being forced into loving someone; they want to make that choice freely, not guilted into it because you go to such great lengths to be nice and thoughtful and to serve them.
   
   
3. Other people's ideas, beliefs, or opinions are more correct and/or important than my own. If someone disagrees with my idea or opinion, it means they don't like me. If I have a bad or flawed idea, this makes me a bad person. These are all false beliefs. My own ideas, beliefs, and opinions are just as valid and important as anyone else's. Just because someone else has a certain opinion and declares it very boldly and confidently does not make it true. Other people disapproving of what I am doing does not necessarily make what I am doing wrong. Other people having different opinions than me doesn't make my opinions wrong or of less intrinsic value, nor does it make me of less intrinsic value. It's very possible to disagree with someone and still love them and not think any less of them. Having an idea that doesn't work or that has cons is an opportunity to learn and come up with a different idea, not a reason to repent.

A lot of the things I've been learning are probably obvious to a lot of people, but they were not obvious to me. I didn't even realize I believed a lot of these things until recently. It can be hard to recognize the underlying assumptions you are making that are guiding your thoughts, feelings and actions. Not until you recognize these assumptions do you have the power to question them and to change them.

All the false beliefs I've been recognizing in myself have made me more aware of the beliefs that other people hold and are using to guide their thoughts and decisions. For example, I recently took a survey about my thoughts on the equality of men and women in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. It was a pretty biased survey; you could tell what opinions the survey writers held on the matter, and I definitely felt from the questions and the answer options I was given like I was being pushed to give evidence for their opinions rather than being given the opportunity to honestly communicate my own thoughts.

One specific question on the survey really stood out to me though because of the false belief I recognized behind the question. The question asked something along the lines of, if women held more leadership roles in the church, how would that affect your religious/spiritual life? This question assumes that other people can have a significant influence on a person's personal religious/spiritual life. This is false. The quality of my religious/spiritual life completely depends on me and the personal relationship that I develop with my Heavenly Father. Other people only have as much power over my religious/spiritual life as I give them. Other people's choices or responsibilities in the church have nothing to do with my own personal relationship with Deity. As Paul explains so eloquently in Romans 8:35, 37-39:

35 Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword?
37 Nay, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him that loved us.
38 For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come,
39 Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

We have to take responsibility for the quality of our own religious/spiritual life and not blame any lack we feel in that area on other people or on circumstances that we think are less than ideal. The weaknesses and shortcomings of men and women cannot separate us from the love of God and a rich religious/spiritual life.

As I've discovered and worked to rid myself of the false beliefs I've developed throughout my life and replace them with truth, my heart and my perspective have changed, and I have been able to feel so much more peace and joy in my life and to become so much better of a disciple of Christ.

In honor of the Christmas season, and in celebration of His birth and life, I want to share my personal testimony of Jesus Christ with you.

My Testimony of Jesus Christ

I know Jesus Christ lives. I know that He came to earth to free us from sin and death. I know that through His atonement we can be cleansed from all our sins and have our hearts changed. I have seen my own heart change as I have humbly sought His will for me and prayed sincerely for help to change. I know that the more we align our lives with God's will, the more joy and peace we will feel, no matter what hardships we are facing. Christ really is the Prince of Peace and can give us peace and comfort that passes understanding even in the darkest times of our lives. As we learn to follow His example and become true disciples of Christ, we will come to a greater understanding of spiritual truths and our burdens will be lightened.

I know that we each had a personal relationship with our Savior before this life and that He wants nothing more than to see us safely back home again with our Father in Heaven and has made that possible for each one of us through His atonement and is cheering us on every step of the way. He is patient and forgiving of our weaknesses, empathetic to our sorrows and struggles, and joyous at our triumphs. He is our Savior and Redeemer, our advocate with the Father, and a true and trusted friend to all who humbly seek Him. My gift to Him and to you this holiday season is to share my testimony of my Savior, Jesus Christ, in His name, amen.