I love that when you experience troubling emotions you can turn to the Lord for help, and He will help you. I used to do a lot more wallowing when I experienced difficult emotions, or else I would try to use methods of coping with them that were not very effective. My emotions controlled me a lot more than I controlled them. It has been amazing to see the difference now that I have developed the habit of immediately turning to the Lord in prayer as soon as I recognize that I am experiencing emotions that I know do not come from the Spirit. The Lord is actually amazing at helping me see things in a different, more truthful light that changes the way I am feeling about any particular situation, and He is always prompt to do so when I ask.
My most recent experience with this was yesterday when I was studying my patriarchal blessing. This sounds like it would be an uplifting activity, but lately when I’ve studied it, it’s been a little difficult for me to feel the Lord’s love for me through it. The things that stand out to me are all the warnings and cautions, and they make me feel like the Lord sees me as weak, easily tempted and not to be trusted. That’s not how I usually feel about my relationship with the Lord right now in my life though. Lately in my life I’ve been feeling the Spirit guiding me a lot to do different things that bless my life and the lives of others, and I’ve really been feeling like more of a partner with the Savior in doing His work on the earth.
So, generally in my life I feel like the Lord loves me and is pleased with me, and it troubled me that when I read my patriarchal blessing that is not how I felt. I prayed and talked with the Lord about my feelings and asked for His help in being able to see and feel His love for me through my blessing, to know that I am loved and cherished by my Father in Heaven for the good I am trying to accomplish in my life and in the lives of others.
As I prayed and thought about my blessing, it was like the Lord flipped a switch in my brain, and I was suddenly able to see how the words of warning themselves were a sign of my Heavenly Father’s love for me. Heavenly Father wanted to clearly tell me that Satan would try to tempt me and the ways he would do so. He wanted to make sure that when Satan tries to lie to me, I will not be taken in by his lies but will see them for what they are and know that those thoughts and feelings do not come from my Heavenly Father and do not reflect eternal truths. Heavenly Father wants to make sure I understand clearly His expectations of me, the great blessings that will come to me as I keep His commandments, and the methods Satan will use to try to draw me away from Him.
My Heavenly Father knows what information and counsel I need in order to stay strong in the face of adversity and temptation, and He loves me enough to give it to me. Not because He fears I will fail, but because He knows that with an adequate amount of truth and information and an eternal perspective I will have the knowledge and power I need to succeed. The words of warning in my patriarchal blessing are tools given to me by a loving Heavenly Father to help me succeed in my battle against Satan and my own weaknesses. He gives them to me not because He fears I will fail, but because He knows that armed with them I can and will succeed.
I am grateful for a Heavenly Father who knows me so well and loves me enough to give me all the help and support I need to make good choices and make it back to Him. And I am so grateful for the increased light and truth that I can receive from the Lord when I ask that has the power to change my troubling emotions to feelings of peace, love, and hope from the Spirit.
*Note: If you are not a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and you are wondering what a “patriarchal blessing” is, here are a couple webpages that kind of explain what they are:
